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A chicken is crossing Vine Street

By Howard B. Owens

Police have been dispatched Vine Street, Batavia, for a chicken crossing the road.

No word on why the chicken is crossing the road.

UPDATE 6:40 p.m.: Responding officer: "Do we know why it's crossing?" Dispatcher: "I guess to get to the other side." The location is 116 Vine St.

Howard B. Owens

Scott, I guess I should have gone for that more noir spin.

"It was dark chilly night when the Blue Knight was dispatched to a dark residential street in a tiny rust belt city in the western part of the Empire State. His mission: Find the chicken. Talk with the chicken. Ask one pressing, soul-searching, gut-wrenching question: Why did you cross the road?"

Oct 26, 2017, 7:44pm Permalink
Scott Ogle

By that time, Howard, 'Bantam' Joe Pollo was telling no tails. It had been for him a world full of scratch, but three gunshots in the dead of night had left his chicken road quiet as a detour through Cemetery City.

Oct 26, 2017, 8:03pm Permalink
Billie Owens

Tom, in case you haven't been paying attention, our scanner reports -- "lite news" have never replaced coverage of more substantive stories. We put them up regardless of the news flow because we choose to do so. Been this way since day one.

Oct 27, 2017, 2:34pm Permalink
Howard B. Owens

The pope could have been shot in Darien, Pembroke could have been nuked, a new ice age reported in Bergen, Warren Buffett buy City Centre, and the entire City Council resign en masse, all in one day, and if we heard something like this on the scanner, we'd still put it up. Duh!

Oct 27, 2017, 3:14pm Permalink
alvin tufts

Holy ****. I just clicked the back button and it actually took me back to the main page I just clicked from. This hasn't happened on the Batavian for me in years. It always sends me to some random article from years ago. Is this problem fixed for everyone that was having it?

Oct 27, 2017, 5:40pm Permalink
Lorie Cook

Billie & Howard, you got nerve thinking you can run your website as you wish. People need to find better things to complain about like child abuse or something important.

Oct 27, 2017, 10:59pm Permalink
Brian Graz

Anyone who has researched chickens as I have done(???) knows that this chicken was demonstrating how to cross the road to the city's deer population.

Oct 28, 2017, 2:23pm Permalink
Ed Hartgrove

Why, Brian?
Are the city deer illiterate? Everyone knows there are signs erected for deer to cross. But, then again, you may be right. The signs don't demonstrate HOW or WHEN to cross, just WHERE (besides that, we all know they NEVER cross where they're supposed to). That's why, when I encounter a "deer crossing" sign, I always speed up, 'cause I know they aren't gonna be there.

I don't worry so much about it, here in Florida. The deer I've seen down here look like emaciated greyhounds.

Oct 28, 2017, 6:53pm Permalink
Kevin Ross

Could we please change the subject. I am sick of hearing about the chicken crossing the road. That being said, could we discuss something much more important. Which came first the chicken or the egg?

Oct 29, 2017, 6:21pm Permalink
Ed Hartgrove

Kevin. You asked, "... could we discuss something much more important?" Here you go.

While it has nothing to do with "chickens", except maybe similarities in brain size, take a couple minutes to listen to Tennessee's Democratic Congressman Hank Johnson's fear that an influx of 8,000 U.S. Marines onto the island of Guam will cause the island to tip over. 'Ya can't make this crap up! Video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7XXVLKWd3Q

Back to your "more important" issues, how about doing our homework before electing people like that?

Oct 29, 2017, 11:20pm Permalink
Scott Ogle

"Could we please change the subject. I am sick of hearing about the chicken crossing the road. That being said, could we discuss something much more important. Which came first the chicken or the egg?"

Good call, Kevin. History tells us that one day the chicken and egg lay content in bed together. The chicken took a long draw off a cigarette, and lazily reflected, "Well, I guess that answers that question."

Oct 30, 2017, 2:26am Permalink

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